When the tide is high, you just get low. – “Be Alright” by Kehlani
I heard the above lyrics yesterday as I was on my run, ( my newly implemented running routine that is lol) and it made me go off into this deep thought process. I felt like it spoke to me. Tides representing the storms of life, hardships, a relationship, a friendship, whatever is overpowering you, and the next part “you just get low”. So that means that overcoming power you are experiencing, time for you to “get low”, refocus. Take some time to yourself and reevaluate. I had to do that, I think everyone finds themselves in a “get low” phase” at one time or another. Thanks, Kehlani, I needed to hear that. And maybe you do too.
When it was my time to get low, I did it gradually. I didn’t just stop talking to people, change my number and fall off the face of the earth. Nope, my strategy was a lot more subtle. I’ll show you my method:
Step 1: Be so productive, you’re unavailable
When I knew it was time to reevaluate my life I wanted to do a thorough job of it. My life was in such turmoil, I wanted a completely fresh start. So I quietly started lining up interviews for other jobs. I interviewed quietly. I never spoke about what I was doing. I kept it all to myself. Then one day when the right opportunity presented itself, I quit my old job and started my new job. Only this time, I didn’t tell anyone. I then got a second job soon after. My ideology was to be so busy, I didn’t have time to talk. I was too scared to just blatantly cut people off for no reason. So I let my schedule be the conflicting factor.
So when my old friends would call “Hey where you been at?” I had an excuse. “Oh, I been working, you know, gotta chase that check” and after awhile the phone calls got less and less ,then they stopped altogether.
Sep 2: Stop being connected.
If you are trying to “get low” and change your life, following your old crowd on social media all day every day is not going to help you. Unfriend negative people. Start a new account. Change your number. Utilize your block list ( the block list is my best friend). Do whatever you need to do to keep that negative force out of your view.
Step 3: Replace
The process of getting low will be pointless if you do not replace your old ways with new healthier ones. This applies to all situations. Whether you are trying to leave a bad relationship, find a new group of friends, and so on. Replace your old life with activities that will shift into becoming a completely new life.
That was just my method, it works differently for everyone and every situation.
I feel as if when you are a young mother, there are so many odds against you, so many expectations placed on your shoulders, and the world expects nothing but excellence. And, if you cannot put out that excellence, you are deemed and immediate failure and written off as another statistic “She woulda been amazing if she didn’t have that baby” is what they say. Because it is impossible to be amazing with a baby at a young age right? WRONG!
I’m here to tell you can DO whatever you want to do!!! It just takes determination, organization, and faith. If you can think it you can achieve it. I plan on helping you do that too. By providing info, tips, insight, a representation that you are not alone in your situation or you’re thinking, and above else motivation and encouragement!
This is my first blog effort so please tell me what you think!
Go check out Kehlani’s mixtape available on iTunes ” You Should be Here”